the gypsies are always right

im drained. im so sick and tired of all this.
i've tried. tried so hard to please.
again and again but all i get is pure disappointment.
the lies. uncanny.
what's wrong, will never be told.
afraid of being shown.
cause' they know it hurts.
i feel disowned.
i dont belong here.
why does this few hours have to reek.
your arrival pleased me with a sense of a fullness.
we have never been close, never.
i still remember you from the box of crayons you bought, from then titilated my interest in arts. yes you.
i've heard so much.
when im in her, she suffered.
i suffered, later.
you were never a great person.
and you will never be.
i dont ask for much.
she doesnt ask for anything.
the scars are you.
stained like how your life is when its meant to be clean.
you were never there.
when i was reaching up, you were somewhere, your world.
your world made up of people that choose to turn away and face the deep blue rather than their loved.
is it love?
no, just companion.
just a theatre show to tell the world how life is getting by and what you have accomplished. which is nothing.
her, i love. you're different.
i rather you make gold appear.
i was brought up without any of you.
the shame.
you tried, but not hard enough.
what are you hiding.
is it another one of your world?
how many do you need.
where are the happiness when we need them.
you know what i mean,
no not you.
i'd rather do it on my own.
you're a nuisance.
an unfair one.
dont hurt her. you're hurting her enough.
i cant bare to think of her pain.
it kills.
years.
decades.
she thinks bout' you.
she told me.
the door is the only barrier keeping us apart but yet i feel you're so far away.
and yes i wish you're so far away.
i dont hate you.
im willing to, but i figured its eating me up inside.
it deprives.
no one's perfect.
but we try to be.
you wouldnt.
instead you're spliting our harmony.
why?
what's wrong with us...